8 Must-Read Books to Improve Your Communication Skills
Many young adults recognize that we need to communicate better. Maybe you fight too much with your spouse, or you feel like your friends never listen to you. Perhaps your coworkers overshadow or steal all of your ideas at work.
Effective communication can be challenging if you are too assertive or passive. It’s not as easy as just talking to someone and expecting things to go your way! We need to learn to express our ideas well while also listening actively.
What are the best books to improve communication skills?
Are you looking to enhance your communication skills? Here are eight must-read books that can help you become a better communicator in personal and professional settings. From mastering the art of persuasion to learning how to listen effectively, these titles offer practical advice and proven techniques to improve your ability to connect with others.
If this sounds like way too much work, don’t worry! Regardless of what you need to work on, there is a self-improvement book out there that can help. Scroll down for eight excellent books to help you learn to communicate better!
1. Nonviolent Communication: Create Your Life, Your Relationships, and Your World in Harmony With Your Values by Marshall Rosenberg
Nonviolent Communication focuses on what you would think: learning to converse with others without blowing up. This book is written by Marshall Rosenberg, Ph. D., a man who has used the system described here to solve conflicts in over 30 different countries. He worked with groups ranging from governments to families, which proves that his techniques apply to every type of human interaction.
Whether you want to communicate better at work, with your friends, or with your partner, Rosenberg’s four-step process can help. Recognizing the observations, feelings, needs, and requests of both yourself and others ensures that even the most tense discussion won’t turn violent.
This book is perfect for people like me who react too quickly to anger. You’ll learn how to embrace compassion and empathy toward others so you can “resolve the unresolvable.” No more yelling and fighting!
While it is often easy to react emotionally during a tough conversation, this book shows readers how to react with their brain instead of their heart. It could honestly help you save some relationships!
2. How to Talk to Anyone: 92 Little Tricks for Big Success in Relationships by Leil Lowndes
When it comes to being a great communicator, it seems like some people have it and some don’t. But How to Talk to Anyone argues that anyone can be a charmer! This title describes 92 tips and techniques to become someone everyone wants to be friends with.
These tricks will help you communicate successfully with people in a wide range of situations, from mingling at parties to negotiating at work. This book teaches readers how to go from a wallflower to the most confident person in the room. You’ll learn to master small talk, work the room like a celebrity, and fit into any crowd.
While this book is super informative, it’s also an entertaining read. Self-improvement doesn’t have to be boring! Plus, with catchy names for the techniques, you’ll remember just what to say even if your palms are sweaty and your heart is racing.
I also love that there are almost 100 different tips in this book. That way, if a particular technique doesn’t feel authentic, you can take tons of other approaches. Every reader can personalize their lessons!
3. Exactly What to Say: The Magic Words for Influence and Impact by Phil M. Jones
Do you ever feel like no one is hearing you? Phil M. Jones’ Exactly What to Say can help you communicate better at work and home. This book will help you master the art of spoken communication so that people listen when you open your mouth.
Though this book was written for salespeople, knowing what to say and when to say it is essential to many lines of work. Jones’ tricks will help you speak up and get what you want, whether a raise, a day off, or just putting your idea into a project.
This title is essential for anyone who works with people for their job, but honestly, every woman can use its techniques. Too often, we ladies aren’t taken seriously in meetings or are brushed aside so the men can talk. After reading this book, you’ll know how to persuade others that your ideas are worth listening to!
4. Not Nice: Stop People-Pleasing, Staying Silent, and Feeling Guilty . . . and Start Speaking Up, Saying No, and Unapologetically Being Yourself by Dr. Aziz Gazipura
Has anyone ever told you that you are “too nice?” If so, Not Nice by Dr. Aziz Gazipura, PsyD, is the perfect title for you.
This book will teach you to stand up for yourself, be assertive, and say “no” when necessary. Whether you keep quiet at work, let your friends make all the decisions, or do whatever your partner says, you can use this book’s techniques.
Not only will you learn to ask for what you want and say no to what you don’t, but this title also helps you deal with the emotions around those behaviors. Not Nice teaches readers how to get rid of those feelings of guilt or fear that may accompany asserting yourself so you can feel free to speak your mind in all of your relationships.
As women, we are often taught that asserting ourselves is terrible. I say, no more! Reading this book will help you break out of that “nice girl” stigma and do what’s best for you.
That’s not all.
If you want to learn more about why being a people pleaser can harm you, check out the video below!
5. Verbal Judo: The Gentle Art of Persuasion by George J. Thompson
Verbal Judo should be on your reading list if you want to learn to communicate better without being super aggressive. This book teaches you how to stop a fight before it starts, whether you’re talking to your spouse, coworker, or kids.
This title is sure to boost your communication skills by showing you how to engage with what others are saying and express your feelings more effectively.
Here’s a secret:
It’s all about listening and showing empathy!
To excel in any conversation, you need to learn Thompson’s five universal truths of human interaction:
- People feel the need to be respected.
- People would instead be asked than told.
- People have a desire to know why.
- People prefer to have options over threats.
- People want to have second chances.
If you remember those five rules, you will come out ahead without looking like an a-hole.
6. How to Start a Conversation and Make Friends by Don Gabor
Are you looking for a shorter read with a significant impact? How to Start a Conversation and Make Friends is your perfect choice. This book teaches readers easy techniques for striking up a good conversation with just about anyone.
By identifying your conversation style, you will learn how to start talking to people and keep the conversation going. From asking the right questions to using body language effectively, you’ll soon be the best conversationalist you know! Gabor even teaches you what not to do to avoid turning people off.
My favorite thing about this title is that it also discusses more modern ways of communicating. With sections on social media and online communications, this book feels fresh and relevant to how millennials interact.
I honestly wish I had this title when I started college! Making friends was easy when I was little (I mainly relied on my gel pen collection), but I was lost when I got thrown into a new group of people. Introverts like me can benefit from the lessons in this book!
7. The Lost Art of Listening: How Learning to Listen Can Improve Relationships by Michael P. Nichols
Here’s the thing:
When we have a conversation, it’s implied that we take turns talking and listening. According to The Lost Art of Listening, many of us aren’t as good at listening as we think.
This book by Michael P. Nichols, Ph.D., uses witty language and simple techniques to help you become a better listener. You will learn to put your emotional reactions aside to understand what your conversation partner is trying to say.
Nichols even includes helpful exercises so you can practice your newfound skills. By stepping back and practicing empathy, you will forge better connections with your partner, friends, coworkers, and everyone you meet.
Knowing how to communicate your ideas effectively is essential. But if you want to communicate better, learning to listen actively is critical!
8. Speak So Your Audience Will Listen: 7 Steps to Confident and Authentic Public Speaking by Robin Kermode
Let’s say you’re reading this list and thinking, “I’m great at communicating! I don’t need any of this!” That may be true when speaking face-to-face, but what about your public speaking skills?
In Speak, So Your Audience Will Listen, Robin Kermode addresses one of the most common fears: speaking in front of a crowd. Whether you have to give a work presentation, speak at a charity fundraiser, or give a toast at a wedding, just the thought of public speaking makes many of us feel woozy.
This book gets to the root of the problem. We get nervous because many of us feel we can’t be ourselves when we address a group. That makes sense. In just seven steps, Kermode teaches readers how to get rid of that public persona and merely converse with the audience.
You will learn how to give effective speeches from the writing stage up to the delivery, with exercises to try at the end of each section. Read this book, and you can say goodbye to sweaty palms and hello to being a confident public speaker!
Are You Ready to Communicate Better?
All of us have some aspect of communication that we could work on. Maybe you’re a hothead who yells a lot. Perhaps you don’t like conflict, so you never stand up for yourself. Or you could be missing out on career opportunities because you aren’t great at networking.
Whatever you want to improve, there is a book on this list to help you communicate better. Experts write these titles, so you know you’re getting some legit information! But don’t worry, they are anything but boring to read.
Which one of these books are you most excited to read? What are your favorite books for boosting your communication skills? Do you have any tips on learning to communicate better? Let us know in the comments below!
