If you find yourself in a situation where it appears your marriage will end, you are likely experiencing a broad range of emotions. It can be utterly overwhelming. Learn more about the steps to take to protect yourself and make your situation a little bit better.
#1) Seek Legal Counsel
If you or your spouse have determined nothing is left in your relationship and the end has come, you first need to take a deep breath. Immediately following the exhale, contact a highly experienced divorce attorney, such as Freed Marcroft’s lead attorney, Meghan E. Freed, Esq. It would be best if you worked with an attorney who understands what needs to happen to have a clean divorce and move forward with your life fairly and equitably.
Whether your dissolution will be amicable or seems headed toward contention, the situation can turn quickly. This is why hiring a divorce attorney is in your best interest. They will advise you on the best practices for proceeding based on their years of experience in this particular area of the law.
Your lives, possessions, finances, and family have become intertwined through the bonds of marriage that are now breaking. Separating these things is not simple, but a divorce lawyer can help make it easier while protecting your rights.
#2) Talk with a Therapist
Even if you and your spouse have agreed to keep things amicable, changing from coupledom to singlehood is an odd road to travel. Your friends and other family members will be there for you, of course, but you need to talk with a professional, too.
A therapist will listen to you and offer professional yet unbiased context and conversation about your relationship, divorce, and the way forward. Compartmentalize your time with your loved ones and have fun with them beyond using them as a crutch or sounding board. They are there for you, but they are not therapists, and it can be difficult for them to sustain that role for a long time.
Getting help from a therapist is something you should lean into even after the divorce. Your feelings will change, and you will go through a range of grief regarding the loss of the relationship. A therapist will help you understand this and assist you in healing to rebuild your life.
Watch this video to learn about one woman’s rebuilding process and advice after divorce.
#3) Get Help Immediately
Sometimes, a divorce occurs because one of the partners is exhibiting abusive behavior. This may include controlling your money, verbal abuse and put-downs, movements and where you can go, and physical and sexual abuse. Not everything is clearly defined or falls into any one of the categories. Some of these behaviors increase over time and become consistently more abusive while the victim slowly loses their self-esteem and confidence.
Once these patterns are established, or there is a fear of violence, leaving an abusive relationship becomes scary. Always know that there are resources to help you in such a situation. Use caution and contact The National Domestic Violence Hotline when it is safe. Caring staff are available 24/7, and it is free and confidential.
#4) Gather Your Paperwork
Your divorce attorney will surely advise you on this, but an essential task to accomplish early in the divorce process is gathering your important documents. This should include everything that is listed jointly as well as individually.
While at it, go through every account of any type and change your passwords. That should include banking, email, phone pins, and anything digital. Keep a list of everything you have done and store it in a safe place. This can be an overwhelming time, and you do not need to repeat tasks because stress is causing you to forget.
Take the necessary steps to safeguard your future by being proactive. Divorcing the person you thought was your best friend and presumed you would spend the rest of your life with will not be easy. Empower yourself. Take action. Go through the motions. You will come out on the other side and be okay. Eventually, you will be even better. You can do this. As time passes, you will enjoy being single. If your relationship status changes, it will be on your terms.