Dating is all fun and games, until, well, it’s not. We all dream of meeting that special person, falling head over heels in love with them, and living happily ever after. But sometimes, things just don’t work out that way. And sometimes you can get stuck in what can be an unhealthy relationship. It’s never a fun thing to feel like the person you love isn’t treating you right. And sometimes it’s hard to know when you’re even in an unhealthy relationship. That’s where warning signs come in handy. Here are 10 signs you need to get out of your current relationship.
1. You Feel Emotionally Drained Every Time You’re with Them
A significant other should be a positive aspect of your life. You should want to have fun with them and look forward to being with them. If getting together with your significant other is starting to feel like a chore, that’s a warning sign. And if you feel emotionally drained every time you’re with your significant other, you may need to get out of your current relationship.
2. You Don’t Feel Like You Can Be Yourself Around Them
Your significant other is supposed to bring out the best in you. He or she is supposed to love you for who you are, flaws and all. If you constantly feel like you can’t be yourself around your significant other, that’s a warning sign that you need to get out of your current relationship. If your significant other really loved you, you wouldn’t need to change to please them. And by change, I don’t mean small things like trying to clean the bathroom when they’re coming over. Small adjustments are signs of a healthy relationship, as long as they’re mutual. But if you feel like you need to change your entire personality just to please your significant other, that’s not a person you should continue to be with.
3. You’re Constantly Fighting
Every couple fights a little bit, that’s just the nature of being human. However, if you’re fighting with your partner every time you two get together, that’s not a good sign. The good times should outweigh the bad times in any relationship. If you two are fighting more than having fun, then that’s a sign you are no longer compatible with one another. If the relationship used to be good and you’ve only recently started frequently bickering with your partner, you may want to try couples’ counseling before breaking up. However, if you’ve done nothing but fight from the start, that’s a sign you need to get out of your current relationship.
4. Your Partner is Always Blaming You
It takes two to fight. So, if your partner is blaming you for every disagreement or thing that goes wrong in your relationship, that’s a sign of an unhealthy relationship. Your partner needs to take responsibility for the things he or she is doing wrong in the relationship too. It isn’t your job to try to fix all the problems in your relationship. If your partner can’t take ownership of the things he or she is doing, then you just need to let them go.
5. Your Relationship Feels Imbalanced
A relationship is a partnership. Neither partner should have more power than the other. So, if you feel like your significant other is constantly telling you what to do, that’s a problem. A relationship should be equal. It’s built on mutual trust and respect. If you don’t feel like you have that anymore, that’s a sign you need to get out of your current relationship.
6. Your Significant Other Gives You Ultimatums
Relationships are about compromise. Two people are never going to agree on everything. As a result, you and your partner must be willing to work together to find common ground and come to a solution when you disagree. If your partner starts giving you ultimatums during fights, like, “change X or I’m going to break up with you,” that’s manipulative and unhealthy. They’re grasping for power and trying to maintain control, and you don’t need to stand for it.
7. You’re Constantly Making Excuses for Your Partner
Sure, everyone makes mistakes and deserves to be forgiven. However, if you constantly feel like you must make excuses for the things your partner does, that’s a sign of an unhealthy relationship. Your partner should not be constantly disappointing you. And your partner should not be consistently disappointing your friends and family either. If you find yourself spending more time making excuses for your partner than feeling proud of them, then it’s time to get out of your current relationship.
8. There’s More Negativity than Positivity in the Relationship
Sometimes, a relationship just starts to fall apart after a while. When the bad times start to outweigh the good times, that’s a sign you need to get out of your current relationship. A relationship is supposed to be fun. You should look forward to seeing your significant other. If this is no longer the case, then it’s simply time to tell them goodbye.
9. Your Significant Other Wants to Monitor Your Messages
If your significant other becomes controlling in any way, that’s a huge warning sign you need to get out of your current relationship. No one who loves you should ever feel the need to monitor your messages or online activity. A relationship is built on trust, and that shows a distinct lack of trust. It also demonstrates a need to have power over you, which is not healthy. If your partner ever suggests keeping tabs on your activity or communication, you just need to say goodbye and get out of the relationship.
10. You Feel Unsafe
If you ever feel unsafe around your partner, you need to get out of your current relationship ASAP. It doesn’t matter how many good times you two ever had together, or how much you might think he or she loves you. You should never feel unsafe in a healthy, loving relationship. If your partner ever threatened you or made you feel unsafe, that’s the ultimate deal breaker.
Breaking up is never fun, but sometimes it’s necessary. If you recognize any of these 10 signs in your relationship, you need to get out of it. Trust me, you deserve better. There’ll be someone far worthier of you in the future.
If you’ve found yourself in an unhealthy relationship, check out some of these resources:
- 30 Signs You Need to Get Out of Your RelationshipASAP
- Are You In A Toxic Relationship?: How To Let Go And Move On With Your Life
- Psychopath Free (Expanded Edition): Recovering from Emotionally Abusive Relationships With Narcissists, Sociopaths, and Other Toxic People
- I Am Free: Healing Stories About Surviving Toxic Relationships With Narcissists And Sociopaths