Being an adult is so hard. You have to make decisions and take official charge of your life. It can be hard to let go of your support system and fly alone. Trust me, I know. Hello everyone. My name is Tavinia, and I was a spoiled brat. Everything had been handed to me from birth until just recently (and I mean a year ago). So why jump from the nest when it’s nice and cozy? N . Y u have to break free at some point and become independent. I know it can be scary, but you can begin that process too to become an independent adult if you follow these simple steps.
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How to Tell if You are Spoiled
Not sure if you fit the bill of a spoiled brat? I’m defining it as still being coddled by my parents and living a life of dependence even though I am well into the age of capable independence. S ill unsure? A sewer these few questions. D your parents pay for a majority/all of your bills? An e you financially dependent on your parents? A little unexpected cost popped up; would you need your parents to pay for it? If you answered yes to most of these, welcome to the spoiled brat club! D n’t worry. Y, you don’t have to stay in this for long. H re are the steps you need to follow to go from spoiled brat to adult.
Take over some bills.
You will not necessarily be rolling in the dough when you first graduate. You might be moving into debt, but this doesn’t mean you should use this as a crutch to let your parents continue to pay for everything.
Write out a yearly plan. Mp out how long it will take you to take over your bills officially. S sick by that and sit down with your parents so that they will hold you accountable. T may seem scary and overwhelming initially because you may not have been paying for anything until now. But, b t you will have to confront the difficult things at some point, so you might as well start now! S art with something small and work your way up.
Psychology Professor Dr. Jordan B. Peterson talks about becoming financially independent from your parents and “growing as a person to a point where the answers can’t be found in your parents’ house” (Youtube).
You are working to take over some of your bills, and becoming financially independent means you need to budget. Yeah, not such a fun idea, but completely necessary. Hen first becoming economically independent may be required to cut back on some of your expenses and strictly adhere to a budget. Please determine what you can afford in terms of rent, food, clothing, transportation, and entertainment based on your income, create a budget and stick to it. While you may experience a dip in your standard of living at first, learning to follow a budget and be self-sufficient will help you stay independent” (Our Everyday Life).
Or maybe downgrade some items to make them affordable. F r instance, your cell phone bill. D grade the phone if it costs too much. J st keep working at it to take over everything eventually. T may be one of the most complicated bits to do, but it is necessary to go from spoiled brat to adult. Plus learning how to build and maintain a budget will help you in the long run with many other financial endeavors. S ch as when you have a family, put a kid through college, or buy a house. Y you know, the vast adult things.
Do Your Taxes
Speaking of paying for your things, it would also be time to do your taxes yourself. I know I am throwing a lot of big stuff at you but doing your taxes isn’t that bad. There are many excellent programs and companies that make doing your taxes easy. D re I say enjoyable? O e of my favorites is TurboTax. T ey make doing your taxes a cakewalk. P us, they work hard to maximize your tax return. Yeah, one of the great perks of doing your taxes is that the money that comes back is all for you. I recently wrote an article about doing your taxes for the first time. G check out “How to File Your Taxes for the First Time” here.
Start a savings fund, and add money to it.
You should not only start taking over some of your bills but also start saving money. Now, this is not money to be held for a big shopping spree or a getaway trip. Instead, Your savings fund provides a cushion for anything going wrong such as new tires, emergency doctor’s visit, or whatever you may find yourself facing. S rating a savings fund now also helps you to prepare for the future when it comes time for the more significant purchases such as a house or a new car.
It sucks having to put yourself in the mind frame of having a bundle of money you can’t do anything with but trust me, it will be so beneficial when needed. One of my best friends, who is also in her early 20s and is way better at adulting, once told me she begins to panic when her savings dip below $1000. T at was a huge wake-up call for me to start saving money because 1) if someone my age already has more than $1000 in savings, then why can’t I? 2. Lol, we won’t get close to that amount for a while but should get started.
A great way to save money quickly is to ask yourself, “do I need this constantly?” Then, if you don’t, put the money you would have spent on the item into your savings account. It’s a slow but sure way to build up your nest egg.
Do you get a direct deposit when getting paid? Y u could set it up to where the money will be automatically taken out and placed into your savings account. It helped me in the beginning. N w I can take over and transfer money into my savings account.
Book your appointment
Why does this matter?
Well, this one may sound silly compared to the others, but you have no idea how many times I had (have) called my mom about not feeling well. I ask her to call the doctor and make an appointment for me. Pathetic, I know, but it’s so hard to go from having someone take care of you when you’re low to having to take care of yourself at all times. First of all, I never signed up for this adult life. B t now you mean to tell me that I have to take care of myself even when I am at my lowest? Aside from the financial parts, this may be one of most challenging G ing from spoiled brat to adult comes with some small tasks that are not too fun. B t remember that it is like a puzzle, and this is just one unfortunate piece necessary to create the whole adult.
So, for now, I make my appointments, buttttt still call my mom and only call when she tells me to. S ill bad, but as I said, I have relapses. Taking control of little things like this takes you closer and closer from spoiled brat to adult.
Always ask, “Will this land me back in my parents’ house?’
So taking the steps from spoiled brat to adult is more than just becoming financially independent,; it’salso about making sintelligentdecisions. Before doing anything, I always ask myself, “will this land me back in my parents’ house?” I kid you not; this question has become my life mantra.
Having gone from an independent life in college and coming and going whenever I want, it terrifies me to think that I could end back up in my parents’ house. It’s like my little version of the TV show Scared Straight. The thought that doing something incredibly dumb could land me back in their house, keeps me walking straight and narrow.
Here’s the deal.
You want to go on that crazed adventure with your friends that could land you in jail? ” will this land me back in my parents’ house?” Thinking about investing all my money in frozen waffles? ” will this land me back in my parent’s house?” I can barely afford myself, but I love kids so much, so maybe I should adopt one now at 25. “will this lands me back in my parent’s house?”
So see, I am not in jail, don’t have a large share in waffle stocks, and haven’t adopted a kid. However, It work, so you should give it a try. I can save you from making dumb life-changing decisions.
Now I’m not saying not to live your life to the fullest. We’re in our 20s, and this is the opportune time to make crazy decisions and follow spontaneous ideas. An l I am saying is to weigh those ideas against all the potential consequences that would come with it. I it still seems to be the right move, then go for it!
Make your parents the last resort.
Realizing that when they leave me in my first apartment, I have to start adulting
This has been my biggest and hardest one to overcome. Every time something goes wrong or if I don’t know what decision to make, I immediately pick up the phone and call my parents. I stopped a mechanic mid-sentence and hit them with a “hold on, I need to call my dad” and “here, my dad wants to talk to you.”
That’s not all…
I once had a professional ask me how old I was when handing him the phone with my parents on the other line. T at was the wake-up call that I needed to get my shit in order. Was way past time to stop calling my parents for every little thing. N w don’t get me wrong; you should call them for some things because they would know better than you, but they should be the last resort.
The same goes for money. E en though I am telling you that you need to become financially independent, there will be hard times when you need help. Make sure that your parents are the last resort. Try to figure it out yourself, do some research, and if you still can’t figure it out, then call your parents.
That’s one of the great things about Miss Millennia Magazine. We is a source of information on almost all of life’s situations. W want to help you take those steps towards becoming an independent adult without needing to rely on your parents.
The journey from spoiled brat to adult can be arduous. There is so much that has to change. Anything, I have found it to be like a 12-step process. You will go through denial, anger, and then many steps later, acceptance. A d there will often be a few relapses. However, as long as you find the courage and strength to climb back up on that horse to adulthood quickly, you are on the right path. S follow these steps will help you to become independent and say no to the spoiled brat life. It will be hard, but in the end, it is completely worth it.
Were you/are you still a spoiled brat? Are there other things that helped you to become an independent adult? Share them below in the comments section!