In order to become a positive person and focus on positive things, you have to be positive within yourself and be surrounded by encouraging people. Sometimes the road towards self-growth can be a challenging one, even more-so when you have toxic relationships. Say you have a negative friend? It may be easier for you to separate yourself from them, but what about family members who are also harmful to your well-being?
Cutting a family member from your life may not be as simple as cutting a friend. We usually cut people off when they bring us down, are persistently negative, discouraging, hateful, estranged, jealous, or downright physically and verbally abusive. When it comes to family, the ties are so close, that it is harder to just separate. Doing so may be noticed by other relatives, and that may result in a divide between family.
Sometimes a family issue can be resolved, but is not, simply because no one wants to put in the effort, or someone decides to cut someone off for a silly reason. The advisement of cutting a family member may be extremely hard. This is why this should always be last option, as there are other conflicts that may arise out of it. Before you make any major decisions that may not just affect you, see what can be repaired.
Why you Should Cut a Family Member:
- You fear this person
- This person is always negative towards you
- This person finds ways to irritate you, no matter how pleasant you are
- This person is never pleased with anything you do
- This person denigrates you in the presence of others (friends or family)
- This person is repeatedly hostile and violent towards you
- This person uses and takes advantage of you
- This person does not care about your well-being
- This person is a lost cause and blames you
- You feel low and mellow when this person is in your presence
And several more.
Cutting them Completely
Your safety and well-being should be your top concern. If there's no hope for this relationship to be repaired, it's time to move towards a separation. If this person has also proven to be invaluable to your life, it’s best to completely remove them. If you're from a very tight-knit family, it would be best to advise them of why this is the best soltuion for you, and let them know how this strained relationship makes you feel. This may be harder to do for closer family members, like your parents or a close cousin or uncle. However, if that family member falls under more than two or more of the reasons above, in the very least, set some boundaries.
Set boundaries by disassociating from frequent interactions with this person. Try to remove unnecessary communication with them, and avoid harboring any guilt for doing so. Carrying any guilt for wanting to move up a positive path may draw you back to negative relationships that are detrimental to your health. Remember, the distance you set between yourself and this person will benefit you in the long run.