Learning to forgive is hard, especially when a person has hurt you beyond natural measures.
How can you just be OK when someone has taken your trust, your love, your loyalty, your all, and shattered every part of you into a million pieces? How can you forgive after that? How can you forget? Anyone who has been there before can tell you that it's not easy, but I'm here to tell you that it IS possible.
There are many circumstances that can cause a person to face the forgive-and-forget situation. However, all of the circumstances have something in common: your conscience. No matter the decision you make, whether to forgive or to hold on to your feelings of resentment, your decision will always sit on your heart.
If you find it difficult to forgive someone for something that they could never take back in a million years, ask yourself: “Is it worth holding onto that hatred forever?”
You will find that the person you're holding these feelings toward starts to take over your life. You wake up angry; days at work may seem longer. You become irritable with people. You may not trust anyone. You begin to change as a person because you are still holding onto what someone has done to you.
Again, ask yourself: “Is it worth it?” Is it worth it for the person who hurt you so badly to stay on your mind? Do you feel good thinking about how many pieces your heart is in?
By forgiving, you are not saying that what that person has done to you is right. According to the Free Dictionary, to forgive means “to excuse for a fault or an offense; to renounce anger or resentment against.” What you are saying when you forgive is that you have acknowledged the situation, it was wrong, and that you are moving on from it. Forgiving does take time. It may not happen overnight. Everyone is different. But I do know that you will feel better as a person once you take that step and forgive.
Forgiving is the first step in the process. Once you have forgiven someone for the pain that they have caused you, you can't hold onto it anymore. You have to let it go. You have to forget it. You may not trust that person ever again, but if you see them at the store or in the mall, say hello! Don't reminisce about what happened between you or what could have been because that part of your life is behind you now. Forgive and forget. Be blessed.