It needs to be said: a boring date is such a bummer.
Boring dates give you a reason to avoid dating altogether. These dates are awkward, difficult, and ultimately spell disaster for you and your date for the rest of the evening. And so, as much as possible, you try to steer clear of boring dates, which means you end up looking for the perfect, most interesting person.
But of course, this ‘perfect, most interesting person’ hardly exists, and if he or she does, then it’s usually in a realm that is less than physical (if you get what this means). Further on into the timeline, then, what this would mean for someone who has become as picky as you have is that you end up not dating at all, for fear of failure or of becoming boring yourself.
The better thing to do, therefore, instead of avoiding boring dates, is to learn how to deal with a boring date, and, as you may hope, turn it into one of the best ever, for both you and your partner. Here are some tips that might be helpful for you.
1. Remember: not every single silence is because of you and it’s not up to you, either.
People usually make the mistake of interpreting every single gap in the conversation as something that they need to fill themselves. This mistake usually results in a different sort of awkward horror, with you not always saying the most appropriate things (“uhm, you know, my dad’s uncle just got released from prison two years ago and he wants to live with us but my mom won’t let him, so, uhm, how about you? Do you, like, have an uncle?”)
The way to go is to keep yourself reminded that you are not in charge of every single silence, the same way that you are not in charge of what’s being offered on your Klook offers. Instead of exerting the effort yourself, allow yourself to be surprised and watch how your date addresses the silence.
2. People like talking about themselves; use this to your advantage.
As someone who’s on a date, you probably know that you’ll be required to ask the “tell me about yourself” question. However, this is not always the most fruitful of quests. For some people and some dates, there are times when this just might lead to a dead end. And in the face of that dead end, there are also some people who interpret it as a date that has just dies its natural death.
But then again, this does not have to be the case. If you think about it, the information that you end up with, no matter how seemingly meager, just might be a treasure mine. Watch out for the sentences where your dates eyes light up when speaking. Is he talking about Lisa from Black Pink? Is she talking about cars? Always look out for the passions, because these passions usually lead to the most rewarding of positions. Learn to ask what is it that makes he or she tick, and then work your way from there. Who knows? You just might find your soulmate by asking the right sort of questions.
3. Conversation starters are all around you. Use those eyes.
As public as dates may go, it is therefore pretty obvious that in such public places, you can definitely find something interesting to think about. Imagine if you were dining in a restaurant, and the couple seated in the table right next to yours is arguing, quite loudly you might add. So loud you can actually hear what they’re fighting about. Well, there’s your chance. Ask your date for his or her opinion. Does he or she approve of such loud arguments? Does he or she believe in marriage? Surely, that’ll start the ball rolling.
While that may not be the most appropriate thing to do etiquette-wise, it definitely helps to keep the boredom away. With that in mind, it won’t be a problem for you and your date anymore, primarily because you’re no longer caught up in an awkward silence that neither of you asked for.
4. Go to places that you already like or enjoy.
Wanna avoid a boring date? Pick a place that you already like. Pick a place that already gives you the enjoyment that you’re looking for. For instance, if you’re the kind who loves a lot of music, then suggest to go on a date with karaoke. Or, if you like some art, then take your date to the artsy cafes that have become your favorite. This is your chance to share your passion with your date, so it won’t help if you pass up this chance.
Never mind that you’re not sure if your date or partner would like it, too. The key is to share what you think is so lovable about it, and then to hope that your date feels the same way. If not, that’s something to talk about still, isn’t it?
Conclusion: Dating is a risk you take.
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Obviously, dating is hardly something whose end you can always foresee. More often than not, the outcome of a date is usually something that will surprise you. So instead of trying to avoid taking the risks that dating entails, go ahead and take that leap. (While you’re at it, check out and spice up your life with e-matching.)