The answer is yes: especially if you are a poor recent graduate! In my case, going home again meant leaving the city I grew to love, and STILL love to this day: Boston! In this city I learned how to take care of myself, make new friends, dominate karaoke, and not to mention have my first experience with family therapy! Basically I felt unstoppable in Boston; I couldn’t help but wonder if this power would come back to Maryland with me.
After moving home, I easily got a job working as a waitress with my sister at a local seafood restaurant. I was so grateful to know I would have money coming in again. Frustration soon set in, however. I found myself in a bad mood wondering how I found myself back in a restaurant – surely this was not the future I had planned for myself!
I immediately decided my CV needed some revamping, and I spent a day doing so. The next day, I resolved myself to send my CV out to at least 5 different prospects a day – can you tell I was desperate?
I must have done something right because shortly after starting this process I landed my current job! All of a sudden I was discussing travel plans for training. It was real! I became the newest Functional Family Therapist in Anne Arundel County! Before I knew it, I was back to working with families which was what I wanted all along. It was not how I imagined, however.
Working late hours at my job and living in a fairly isolated location really affected my social life, and perhaps to a certain extent played a role in the end of my relationship. This sounds shallow so I’ll call myself out on it because that statement is not about being shallow; let me explain. My social life holds importance to me because I am a social person, hence therapist. I also think that I learned a lot about myself through different social interactions while I was in Boston. Because my parents have graciously welcomed me back home, I had the idea that having a social life was the only way I could hold on to that “powerful” girl from Boston. I wanted to get back into karaoke, and I wanted to meet new people. Being that my friends did not leave the state, but continued on with their lives and relationships I wasn’t sure where I fit with them. Since I was no longer involved in a relationship, my time became more “my time” than it had in a long time.
Back to this idea of being “powerful” or perhaps a gentler term would be “mindful” of the role I wanted for myself in my own life. Being that I do not have my own living space anymore, I have made it a point to decide what ways I can take charge of my life again. Why did I do so well in Boston? Because I wanted to and I was excited for it. No, things have not gone as I wanted per se, but all is not lost! I am still in charge! I constantly remind myself that I am living at home while actively saving to eventually move out again (DC, anyone?!) and reclaim some of my glory. I am also working to discover what other ways I can feel more fulfilled in my life. Cooking classes? Book clubs? The possibilities are endless.